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Deviance​/​Decadence - A Love Letter to the Dadaists Who Killed Themselves for the Sake of the Joke

by Meursault

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1.
Ghost 03:49
Society's a wasted dream Opting out will set you free I mean all of you out there In denial about all that you're becoming I am just a ghost now I'm just a figure that you never see around I can't talk anymore, I've lost all of my charm I'll see myself out I'm addicted to the way it feels To be negated and eccentric Like a psychotic joke or a voyeur I exist as an occurence of disorder I will haunt the dead space And fill every peripheral hallways I can't mess with this dream, I am some other thing I'm an enigma Lately I've been feeling like I'm not here And no one seems able to pull me out Sure, I'm passing through this life I live But really I am somewhere else I am just a ghost now I am invisible and I float around I have no silhouette, I am filled with distress I am an island
2.
Good Luck 03:08
Goodbye my friends I'll see you again In the house round the bend I tried to be The loveliest flower But I soon shrivelled up And fell to the ground Farewell my friends I'll see you again But don't wait around The time will come When you'll just forget And I hope for the best I hope you'll be happy (And if you're not, well, good luck)
3.
Drawn to the dead, I am closer than ever The spirits are solvents, they're taking me in I'm medicating and self-isolating Losing my mind to my dreams But I’d rather be mad than domesticated I’d rather wear a dunce cap than watch the news You're all going too fast, you're causing a crisis Your boredom is a violent ruse (Nothing’s out there) Live a charmed life with it's sweet anesthetics (Nothing’s changed) Get old and be happy and live like a king (I’m invisible) Maybe it's fate, maybe nature's corrupted (You can’t see) She sings and we all fall asleep (Always shaking) But I stay awake watching pictures in limbo (Always home) And sleep through the conditional daydream (I’m invincible) Your life’s been wasted on the days that you’ve been wasted (I’ll Die Alone) I guess it's just the same
4.
I would like to burn up your love Watch it light up for the last time Push it back and watch it glow Watch it flicker out to nothing at all Wake up from your dream and look at your kind Look at what you’ve made and tell me it’s fine Take your final exit and I’ll take mine Being beside ourselves we won’t have to die God’s in my house he’s got a bad headache Look at you, now look at me smile I am a child and I’m incessantly loud Look at us we’re proud of ourselves We’ve lost our wisdom playing dumb for days and days and days Don’t you know we live like ghosts? Some innocent dead, some lost drug You will suffer for me - I’ll forget your love Just forgive me for it, don’t make me apologize God’s in my house, locked in the back room
5.
In that day I’ll mess it up for you When you're high and I'm coming down I'm waiting to pass out Hold my head, I can’t lift it alone I don’t think I'll stay for the last word I’m just not that smart when it comes to being dumb I can’t deal with my friends And the things going on in the world just take me back When I grow up it’s going to be that bad So I just live in the memory See it backwards, before I made a thousand mistakes I've become what I hate I wish I could go back To that time - I can’t remember what happened There was some kind of brightness or light that was gleaming And I just loved it
6.
White Lies 03:46
I put on my Sunday best A smile for the things I regret I figure it’s best to wear it clean cut Short hair and white socks Took a dose to forget which way to go To justify my bad manners And deep pockets Spending all my secrets on wise cracks A middle finger behind my back I’m surprised they haven’t caught on yet I guess I’ve just got the right look I’m just bored, I’ve got no other excuse Whether it’s all meaningless or whatever Ecclesiastical, philosophical, crack pot ideal I took another dose despite my black outs and bad dreams I'm going to the doctor next week I can't decide, should I tell the truth? Or should I pretend that I'm still innocent? I despise all of your friendly tricks Just leave me alone to count my blessings Paying full price for my selfishness If you put me in a cage I’ll deal with that Consider me a criminal for intentional hystericals Put me in a white coat locked in a monestary Spilling my blood for my bad deeds I could never make up for the things I said Or all the people I’ve mind fucked But if the guard lets me go Gives me the keys, I’d run for the hills and never look back I settle down by a white fire I get by telling white lies I put my faith in a defective charm And abide in it’s bad luck
7.
Some name of nothing much Wrong about everything Caught between versions of right I am so very limited Deviant and decadent Bored with delusions of worth Caught up in distractions And unresolvable angst Maybe some divine pressure Could pull me out of existence Shock me back into innocence With my soul under duress Maybe some catastrophe Could bring about something else Something to get God to come out And fix my fucked up face
8.
You were so kind to me You said you like the way that I talk So naturally I fell in love You said you wanted to hang out sometime I said I'd like that a lot I said why don't we go for a ride I just got my license, I know how to drive I looked you up on the internet Sent a request but you didn't respond So I think you lied to me You said strangers are beautiful And you told me that you love to talk So why don't you listen to me? I've got so many interesting things on my mind When you put your head on my shoulder As we talked on the subway ride home I should've known better then I should've known you were just playing sincere
9.
Wait, I can't tell if you're there I can touch you but I can't feel My tongue can't speak, I gain no memories that I'd like to keep My beautiful life goes by Days change for nothing it seems I wait for the next dull thing And in it's glory my fair body will be bent and awake Defeated, revealed and clean
10.
Corridor 02:50
You can take this corridor Or you can take another way out You can take this chesterfield Or you take that love seat You can take my money now Or you can wait till it grows big You can take my plastic house Or you could settle for the TV Or if you’d like you can come with me We can sleep by the highway You can drink up all you want And we could dream about the lakeshore Write a letter to the family Let em’ know why you skipped town 
Or get up early and catch the train 
Let it all be a mystery 

You could meet me at the candy store You know I’m always up for something sweet Spiral down in a sugar crash And taste each other till we pass out Then we could hang from the poplar tree Swinging low till we get home Or you can join me on the bathroom floor Locking lips as we bleed out

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released July 30, 2016

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Meursault Toronto, Ontario

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